I was watching t.v. earlier this week & came across Lifetime (my secret obsession ya’ll, for real!). I got hooked and watched a movie about an amazing interior designer with a crazy boyfriend. Long story short because I don’t want to ruin the movie if you happen to watch it (you totes should), but she literally had, from the inside looking in, a perfect life.
She had the cutest wardrobe & hands down a amazzzzing house that, of course, she designed herself. Like, I wanted to move in with her even though I knew it was just a movie set. Silly, right? I then realized that the character in the movie was literally maybe like only 5 years older than me & immediately thought..gosh I have a lot of work to do! I for sure thought this in my head for a good hour or so, then honestly just laughed, realizing that it’s okay to not have it all together.
The Beauty of Not Having It All Together
You see…these upper 20’s are a weird age. You’re no longer trying to figure out which path to take in life, but merely trying to figure out (early in your decision) if the path you choosing is the right choice. You’re not trying to figure out which career to choose ( but if you are, that’s totally okay too!), but trying to decide if the career path you’ve chosen will lead to financial success, happiness & eventually amount to all that you imagined as your younger 20-something self.
We no longer spend our days trying to find a “weekend date.” Instead, we spend them either A: wondering if we chose the right person and making sure we don’t settle because of a lack of dating prospects, or B: figuring out the whole marriage thing, even though so many people make it seem oh-so easy. Or, you’re simply somewhere in between both of these & are still just wondering whats next. Whether all of these situations (or none) are you, the point of the story is: we all have something we are working on, and that’s totally okay.
What Does “Having It All Together” Even Mean?
I hate the stigma that you’re supposed to “have it all together” before a certain age. I mean, what does that mean anyways, to “Have it all together”. For me, it meant a number of things, some of which have happened and others which are not even close to happening yet (ha!). For you, I’m sure it meant a number of things too, and some of those probably haven’t turned out like you wanted. But at the end of the day- why is that bad? I mean, how boring would life be if everything happened just how we wanted?
[Tweet “We learn more about ourselves in the process than we ever would if we just got the end result.”]
Finding growth in the process, not the outcome
If that were to happen, we would’t need a reason for faith, because we would be all we need. We wouldn’t need trust, or perseverance, because we wouldn’t have to work, pray, or trust God for really anything. I truly believe that that’s the true joy of not having everything all together= we learn more about ourselves in the process than we ever would if we just got the end result. Trusting the process is not always easy, but I have learned to love it. We gain true growth through the process, and the process develops us into who we are meant to become.
I’ve learned this, as I’m sure others have, through many experiences that I didn’t really “plan for”. Some fun, some not so much, but all ended up in growth of some sort. I think that’s the beauty of not having it all together—the beauty of knowing you are getting there and life is molding you toward the finish line despite the process you go through. And that, my friends, is this week’s update on life, ha! I mean, what’s that saying? “The best things in life are unexpected.” Maybe that’s true for some, maybe it’s not, but all the same- we all have our journeys to explore.
Until Next Time!
-B
